A Breakfast Scene

          When I got to Ed’s last night he was out! He’d left a note in an envelope addressed to me, with a key. The note read: Had an offer I couldn’t refuse. I let myself in and went to bed. In the darkness all the colour had drained from the world. Everything was a shade of grey.

 

*

 

            Upon walking into Ed’s kitchen this morning I got quite the shock. Alice was sitting there, looking cheerful and drinking coffee at the table. Her hair was ruffled and her clothes only loosely thrown on. She has thick waved chestnut hair, large dark eyes and a wide open mouth exhibiting perfect white teeth. For just a moment I was caught in admiration of her.

            “Morning Tom.”

            “Er… Morning. Is… er… everything okay?”

            “It’s fine now, Ed was just messing about the other day but he apologised last night.”

            I paused for thought. I was glad for Alice that Ed had turned it around, but something about it all sat very uncomfortably.

            “Doesn’t it bother you, though, what he did?”

            “Of course. But it’s Ed, right? This is the sort of thing he does.”

            “That doesn’t make it okay Alice.”

            She looked at me with appreciation. “You’re sweet Tom.”

            “I just felt for you, with everything that’s happened to me lately.”

            At this moment Ed walked in looking terrible, hungover. By contrast to Alice he looked haggard. He cares little for his appearance at the best of times, despite having admittedly rugged good looks and Norse looking blonde hair. He glanced at Alice with painful disgust and yet she smiled back at him with patient love. He shook his head slightly, looked at me and then turned back to Alice.

            “Get the hell out of my house, Alice.”

            “What?” I said. Alice looked horrified.

            “She heard me, I told her to get out. Go on, get out of my sight!”

            I was silenced. Alice started crying.

            “For god’s sake, just go. You’re embarrassing yourself. You can come collect your stuff later.”

            Alice got to her feet and staggered out, sobbing uncontrollably.

            “You’re an absolute monster Ed!”

            “I’m sorry, Tom, I shouldn’t have gone back to her, after my promise to you, but I was sorely in need of a fuck.”

            “Ed! That’s not what I mean! How can you treat her that way? I don’t care about myself.”

            “Look, Tom, not that it’s any of your business but I can do what I like. We were only together a short time and it was obvious to me that it wasn’t going to work out in the long term. So much the better, then, to end it earlier than later.”

            “But did you have to do it like that?”

            “Yes. This way she can hate me and there’s no chance of her blaming herself.”

            “Is that what you think?”

            “Yes.”

            He began to break eggs into a mug. I watched him, trying to make up my mind.

            “Fine.” I said, and went back to my room.

 

*

 

            In the late afternoon Ed came in to invite me to the pub. My anger at the morning’s scene had subsided and I felt I needed to get out. We went to the Fitzroy Tavern near Goodge Street and drank a copious amount of green ginger wine. I could swear that stuff is hallucinogenic. We had a delirious conversation that I can only half remember where a thousand incredible plans for the future were devised.

            At some point we suddenly found ourselves on top of a tall building near the BT tower, throwing coins at the windows of the opposite building to freak out the security guards there. I heard sirens and we made a break for it, sprinting recklessly down the fire escape stairs and onto the street. The police came around the corner and flashlights bathed us in white light. We ran for it and lost them.

            I’m back in bed now and scared to hell. I could lose my job over a thing like that. I need to sort myself out and calm down. Concentrate on what matters.